It is with great hilarity that I present to you the most recent edition of a day in my life. You all may recall that I am currently on eHarmony. Well more recently I figured I’d put a little more effort into it than a simple once per week check of my email. Without fail, that has resulted in a plethora of what I have thought are pretty legit men with relationship potential, i.e. three dates this week alone, similar to my run two years ago on the match.com mealplan. My Tuesday date was inexplicably HOT. When I say hot, I mean melt into your eyes hot. But that is not the point of this post. Let’s just say that the eHarmony selection has not been too shabby as of late.
And this brings me to last night, my second date of the week. I was pretty excited for this one. For some reason as soon as I saw the profile, I felt an instant connection, at least on paper. The guy is a bit on the eclectic side, an artist, different than the typical lawyer or Fed who works 60 hours per week. He looked cute in the pics, and his emails were adorable. So when he asked me to go to the Phillips Collection Art Gallery in Dupont as a first date, I thought that was a brilliant option considering usually online dates consist of drinks at a bar and then food if it goes well.
I arrive at Phillips and look for him at the front door, but no one stands out. I see a guy walking around who looks like he’s looking for someone; it must be him. I go up to said guy and ask, “are you Fred?” This question is always a gamble in the online dating world.
At this point I’m getting a better look at this guy and he’s not really looking like Fred, however, he looks very familiar. I think with dread that this could quite possibly be another guy that I’m currently talking to on eHarmony. But no, it can’t be. What are the chances of that?
The guy responds with, “no, I’m Chris. Are you…Sara?”
My worst fear is confirmed. I have just asked a guy who is not the guy I’m meeting that night if he is Fred, and he is not Fred but Chris, another guy I’m talking to concurrently on eHarmony. Seriously? Did that really just happen? I make things even worse by saying, “oh, did I just email you today?” I did not email Chris.
At this point I’m of course laughing my ass off; I could not help it. It was too absurd. There is no way out of it so I tell Chris that I’m actually meeting another guy from eHarmony there, and that I’m sorry. Chris just replies, “you must get a lot of dates.” Wonderful. Chris goes along to meet his friends and I continue on my search for Fred.
I see another guy standing against the wall. Doesn’t really look like Fred but I figure at least this guy doesn’t look familiar so maybe I’ll ask if it’s him. Not Fred. I’m now batting 0 for 2.
Finally, I get a text from Fred saying he got my ticket and is at the front. I don’t see any more single guys standing around, but he finally appears. Oh, this looks like the guy in the pics. Fred. I’m still in shock and of course laughing at what just occurred so my big mouth goes and actually tells Fred what had happened. I’m sorry, but if you can’t see the humor in that, then we are not meant to be together. I don’t think Fred got the humor. So clearly we were off to a really great start.
No need to go into the details of the date because there is nothing spectacular to report. Besides awkwardly running into Chris during the course of the time at Phillips and Fred later actually asking me to split the bill at the restaurant we went to afterward [guys – this is the kiss of death on a first date. DO NOT DO THIS], I’m sure prim and proper artist Fred was very impressed that right after the date, I was heading off to a David Guetta show at Fur Nightclub, sure to be a completely ridiculous rager full of dancing and staying out till 4am. I don’t really think he got that. Frankly, I didn’t get it either. Point is that he clearly is not my future husband, as I had predicted.
Now, if Chris sees the humor in what happened last night and responds to my apology email, maybe he is actually my future husband. Here’s to hoping there is one out there. And the search continues…