What’s the score?

January 30, 2011

Puma Theory: 1
Regular dating: 0


I ask for one thing and one thing only

January 26, 2011


SOTU 2011

January 25, 2011

Okay I’m doing it again. Another State of the Union live blog post.

Little late…I think we are 15 minutes in already. But let’s just say – this guy is good. He is literally speaking word for word from speech text, or so I hear. Pretty redic impressive if you ask me.

  • Mo cleverly pointed out that there was no mention of Foursquare during the internet shoutout to Facebook and Google. WTF?
  • HE’S sending a budget to Congress?! I’m not even going to comment on that one.
  • I’m not gonna lie, I actually like this Dems/Republicans interspersed throughout the chamber as opposed to on opposite sides. Does give off the fake illusion of both parties working together toward a common goal.
  • John Boehner looks like he’s about to cry.
  • BTW looks like someone is stimulating the economy by hitting their local Palm Beach Tan.
  • [I can’t claim that one on my own either, stole it from a friend’s Facebook post]
  • John Kerry! What the hell has he been up to? He looks like he’s wearing a mask.
  • What the heck are Biden and Boehner laughing about? Is something funny here?
  • They really liked that ‘pat down’ comment. Traveling, without the pat down!
  • BTW saw Kathy walk in a little before the Pres earlier. I have two pictures with her. I’m famous.
  • Hey it’s Max! We are on a first name basis. FYI
  • Who gets seats to this thing? Honestly, I’d rather not be there.
  • Who the hell is that guy and that is one ridiculous wig he’s got on. That or he is in the Hair Club for Men.
  • My boy Boehner looks bored as shit.
  • Waxman. Okay this is truly sad that I know who everyone is during individual cameo shots.
  • Boehner is finally smiling now upon mention of changing the health care law. This guy is going to be a real pleasure to work with in the coming years, I can tell.
  • Boehner still smiling during this discussion. Really? The smirk?
  • Didn’t he propose a freeze last year on discretionary spending? So is this freeze on top of last year’s freeze? Wowzers.
  • $400B saved over the next decade? Seriously, how is this possible bud? Just wondering.
  • I can tell you how to save some money. How about getting rid of this awesome computer system we just installed in our office that has no point whatsoever and is actually killing productivity.
  • oh heyyyy Hillary. This could have been you.
  • phhhh Boehner just looked shocked that Pres said cutting discretionary spending isn’t the only way to cut spending.
  • I wonder if they tell him not to make faces during the speech.
  • Oh jeez med mal reform.
  • I really find that the most amusing part of this is watching the Speaker of the House behind the Pres.
  • Boehner just clapped about simplifying the individual tax code. A positive reaction.
  • Hey is he making fun of black and white TVs? Has he SEEN my wood panel tube?
  • Oh really. When you meet with lobbyists the information is put online? Didn’t know that.
  • I’d like to see you veto those bills with earmarks in it. I love ya Barack, but I call bullshit.
  • Man this is a long speech.
  • Biden has perma-frown. If you compare the lip lines between the two (Biden and Boehner), it’s actually quite amusing. Boehner is flatlined.
  • Michelle – isn’t she sick of this whole Presidency thing yet?
  • Okay I can’t stop focusing on the lip lines.
  • Did he just say Iraq war? I completely forgot about that thing.
  • Still on international security. I lost interest after the health reform discussion.
  • It’s freezing in my apartment. Appropriate.
  • I didn’t see this in the news, but I can only assume that the little white bow on everyone’s vest is for Congresswoman Giffords. Yes/no?
  • Still too many men in this Congress. More women please? Don’t worry, I’m workin my way up. Could use a little more racial diversity too. Thanks.
  • He’s going to Brazil!? I am contemplating a trip myself!
  • Boehner slowly moving to a frown.
  • I swear John Kerry is wearing a mask. He actually looks like one of those Kerry masks you find in the costume stores.
  • I really could use a good flat screen; in fact I can’t believe I still have this little piece of history. I’d like to use this opportunity to post a pic of my TV again.

  • Boehner just drank some water. Okay why am I still watching this thing?
  • awww Nancy in the audience. She’s always wearing a very interesting colored suit for SOTU.
  • P.S. can you believe a Tea Partier is doing a second rebuttal? This should be interesting.
  • Wow, he’s touching on gays and the military. Times are changing.
  • ROTC! I haven’t thought about or heard that since undergrad. haha
  • Is this thing over yet? Ready for bed.
  • How in the world did he memorize this entire speech???? I’m still in shock.
  • He doesn’t know of one person who wouldn’t like to trade places with any other nation on earth? Um, I’d like to trade places with someone in Spain.
  • Yep, I think Boehner is about to cry at his upbringing shoutout.
  • America! America! America! We do big things. He really has a way of getting people riled up.

Donezo. Not bad Pres. Hopefully your approval ratings go up after this. Thanks for listening in everyone. Sorry if this wasn’t as amusing as last years’ effort. I did my best.


January 25, 2011

I went skiing a few weekends ago. No, not out west; as you may recall we went to Snowbird in Utah for a long weekend last February. Oh, the memories. This time I figured I’d get some practice in locally at Whitetail in Pennsylvania, in preparation for another trip out west at some point this winter. In attendance were myself, sister Jean, her boyfriend Dave, Wheels (Tier II Asian), and newbie to the blog, Paul. A few notable happenings occurred, summarized below.

The Moguls
In an unexpected twist of pure joy, my friend Hung (Tier I) decided to come along at the last minute. My lifelong dream is to ski with Hung. Just knowing his anything goes, risky personality, I knew that watching him ski would be hilarious. Well, he lived up to the hype. We were skiing some moguls at one point, and Dave was trying to teach Hung how to better maneuver them. Hung did a run, but apparently he wasn’t giving it his best effort for Dave’s tutorial. So he proclaims…

Wait, let me put my shit into it.

Meaning, let me give it my all and watch this. Well, Hung put his shit into it and went flailing wildly only to take a hard fall. We all agreed that Hung should not put his shit into it moving forward. In fact, since that time, he has gone skiing again and has managed to dislocate his shoulder with the possibility of the bone being chipped. This is what I love about Hung. Him putting his shit into it.

Me skiing some fresh pow. In my dreams.

The Lift Incident
There are five of us on the “difficult” side of the mountain, where a double black diamond seems like a blue after having skied Snowbird. But nonetheless, Dave, Jean, and Paul are on the ski chair in front of us at the lift. Hung and I are about to board the lift, which is a four seater. Something must have gotten lost in translation, because I heard the ski attendant direct us to let the couple in front of Hung and I go on their own chair. Well, Hung heard differently, and told me to hurry up and board the chair along with the couple in front of us. Clearly, the couple heard the same thing I did, because as I came up to the chair entirely too late, the woman somehow ended up on my lap as the chair was lifting from the ground.

At this point, she’s yelling for the ski attendant to stop the chair. My attempts to push her off of my lap and onto the seat next to me so we could go happily on our way up the mountain were not working. She was making every attempt to get off of the chair. Somehow, this ended up in a shouting match between Hung and the woman, that went something like this:

Woman: Get off of me! Get me off this thing!!!
Hung: Calm down lady, we’re just trying to get up the mountain.
Woman: Get off me! Let me down!!  What are you people DOING??!!
Sara: Sorry, we didn’t mean it.
Woman, screaming wildly: What are you doing!??! Get me off this chair! You people are crazy!
Woman, losing control: Don’t you talk to me that way! These people are crazy! Let me down!!!
Sara: Sorry, we didn’t mean it.
Husband: What are you doing to my wife?
Sara: Sorry, we didn’t do it on purpose.
Woman: Stop this chair! I’m not riding up with them. I’m leaving!
Hung: GOOD RIDDANCE! (I would not want to get on Hung’s bad side.)

I guess it could have been worse. What the hell?

Chair stops. Woman and husband depart in fits of rage, and Hung and I are left going up the mountain on the four seater chair by ourselves. I look up to see Dave, Jean, and Paul on the chair in front of us…they had witnessed the whole thing and were really enjoying themselves, laughing hysterically. What just happened?

It’s not like I wanted this woman on my lap. Yet, she was acting as though we did it on purpose. Seriously, lady? Yes, I want you to ride on my lap on the chair lift up the entire mountain. I did in fact get on the lift behind you on purpose, so that you could ride on my lap. Little joyride up the mountain for me.

In summary, it was just another day on the slopes for us. Memorable for sure, and it may be difficult to top the remainder of the season. However, quick note to self for next time: try to get on the lift next to everyone as instructed and not directly behind someone. Readers, take heed.

Fan of fans

January 24, 2011

Someone found my blog by googling “fan in my condo wakes me up.” I found this ironic considering my fan is the only thing that helps me sleep. Sometimes I wonder what I would do without my beloved fan. How would I sleep through that dreaded hacking cough next door or the car alarms wreaking havoc outside my front window? I am proud to be a Fan of Fans. And with that, I leave with you my fan:

my fan

Have a restful sleep tonight everyone,


**I’m sorry that I didn’t clarify. Fans of fans use their fans for white noise to block out any sudden loud sounds that would ordinarily wake one up, not the wind factor.**

Puma theory

January 24, 2011

Theoretically, I hear that women in their 30’s who date men in their 20’s works well, in a number of ways. Can anyone testify to this novel concept?


happy new year

January 20, 2011

Just kidding.